Quick Guide to (Mostly) Recent Science Fiction

It's been an age since I posted anything on this platform, but maybe the pandemic is the time to bring blogs back along with things like baking bread at home. 

I made this graphic for a recent genre discussion hosted by the Massachusetts Library Association's Readers' Advisory section. If you're new to the genre of Science Fiction but want to get started on some recent titles, this might provide a starting point. As I said in my talk, many of the books below could be placed in a variety of the subgenres I've arbitrarily listed, this is not a comprehensive list, it's purely subjective, etc. Link to the graphic here.

Titles and authors:

Space Opera

Behind the Throne, K.B. Wagers

Unconquerable Sun, Kate Elliott

The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet, Becky Chambers

Chilling Effect, Valerie Valdes

A Memory Called Empire, Arkady Martine

Military

Vorkosigan series, Lois McMaster Bujold

Ninefox Gambit, Yoon Ha Lee

Fortune's Pawn, Rachel Bach

Dystopia/Post-Apocalyptic

Moon of the Crusted Snow, Waubgeshig Rice

The Record Keeper, Agnes Gomillion

American War, Omar El Akkad

Afro/Africanfuturism

Broken Earth series, N.K. Jemisin

Who Fears Death, Nnedi Okorafor

An Unkindness of Ghosts, Rivers Solomon

Artificial Intelligence

All Systems Red, Martha Wells

Robopocalypse, Daniel H. Wilson

Ancillary Justice, Ann Leckie

Aliens

The Three-Body Problem, Cixin Liu

Rosewater, Tade Thompson

Lilith's Brood, Octavia Butler

Annihilation, Jeff Vandermeer

Time Travel/Alt-History

Here and Now and Then, Mike Chen

To Say Nothing of the Dog, Connie Willis

This is How You Lose the Time War, Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone

Romance

The Agent Gambit, Sharon Lee and Steve Miller

Ice Planet Barbarians,  Ruby Dixon

Rulebreaker, Cathy Pegau

Polaris Rising, Jessie Mihalik

Climate Fiction

New York 2140, Kim Stanley Robinson

Gold Fame Citrus, Claire Vaye Watkins

Humorous

Redshirts, John Scalzi

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams

Space Western

Serenity: Those Left Behind, Joss Whedon, Brett Matthews, Will Conrad

Dark Tower series, Stephen King

Superhero

The Mighty Thor v. 5, Jason Aaron, Walt Simonson, Russell Dauterman, James Harren

Heroine Complex, Sarah Kuhn

Graphic/Manga

Saga series, Brian K. Vaughan, Fiona Staples

Pluto series, Naoki Urasawa

Steampunk/Cyberpunk

Parasol Protectorate series, Gail Carriger

The Black God's Drums, P. Djèlí Clark

Young Adult Science Fiction with Adult Appeal

Illuminae series, Amie Kaufman and Jay Kristoff

Not Your Sidekick, C.B. Lee

The Marrow Thieves, Cherie Dimaline

Warcross, Marie Lu

Ship Breaker, Paolo Bacigalupi

Proxy, Alex London

Meditation on 2011-2012 Romance Novel Titles

It has been far too long since I've gazed deeply into the heaving bosom of romance novel titles, as I did in these previous posts. I'm about half a year behind schedule, in fact. The good news: this means I have TWO sets of Romantic Times award nominees to draw from (2011 and 2012), in addition to the Romance Writers of America 2012 RITA and Golden Heart awards list. The bad news is that this means I really can't compare this crop of titles to previous years. However, this project is based on my whims rather than any real degree of statistical accuracy. Onward!

Methodology: I copied and pasted all the titles of romance novels into an Excel spreadsheet, de-duplicated, and searched on various keyword stems based on my previous findings and anything else that struck me as relevant while I skimmed the list. That process looks like this:

There are 677 award-nominated titles on my list (some of which are short works rather than novels), and these are my favorites (links go to covers and descriptions):

A Misplaced Cowboy, like a comma, can end up where he shouldn't be.
What an Earl Wants is responsible for an insidious earworm every time it appears.
When You Give a Duke a Diamond, which I always imagine as part of this series.
Lady Doctor Wyre is the first in the Jane Austen Space Opera series. Think on that a moment.

Best Puns: Bathtub Jinn and The Sexorcist
Head:Desk: Daring to Date the Boss and Sheikh Surgeon Claims His Bride
WTF: Reclaiming His Pregnant Widow and Cat on a Hot Steel Flight Deck

Continuing Trends:

Nobility: As usual, being of noble birth is an excellent way to get yourself into a romance novel. Dukes were the clear winner last time, but this time they were supplanted by Ladies, who featured in 16 titles [followed by Duke and Lord, each with 11, Earl: 6, Heiress and Prince: 5, King: 4, and a variety of stragglers with two or three titles]. As for Sheikhs, there were three (plus one harem). Overall, more than 10% of all the nominated titles featured a mention of one or more nobles.

Scots: After a somewhat disappointing showing last year, the highlanders were back in force! Ten titles had "Highlander" in them. In addition, there were six "Scot" titles, one "Laird," and one "Kilt."

Punctuation: I can't help it, it's my favorite trend. This year, there were seven colons (Rancher's Twins: Mom Needed); five dashes, one question mark (Not Fit for a King?), and one ampersand.

Professions of Love:

I also scanned the titles to see what people's jobs were (beyond being noble). Mostly it's the men that get actual jobs, usually in some kind of protective capacity. There were the usual cowboys (7), soldiers (7), and warriors (5), as well as assorted rangers, ranchers, mavericks, and so on. Interestingly, there was one mention of a homesteader and one of a farmer. Some of the women allowed to have professions were three governesses and one nanny, most likely so that they could be seduced against their will from their subservient positions (Seducing the Governess). However, there was also one cowgirl and one lady doctor, so perhaps there's hope after all.

Rogues (7), rakes (1), renegades(2), rebels (3), and scoundrels (2) continued to be popular, although perhaps the low number is some indication that "rake," with its negative connotation, may be falling out of favor?

Notable:

Most notably, the economic downturn seems to have finally penetrated the world of the romance novel, as there was no mention of millionaires, billionaires, tycoons, or magnates. There was also only one "Boss" title.

I definitely spotted a "how to" trend among the titles I scanned. Some novels gave contradictory advice, such as How to Seduce a Rogue and Never Seduce a Rogue, but the advisory urge was strong. There were six titles that begin with "How To," two "Guides" and one featuring "Rules," as well as three "Lessons." By picking up one of these books, you could learn:

How to Bake a Perfect Life
How to Dance with a Duke
How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
How to Marry a Duke
How to Seduce a Scoundrel
How to Woo a Reluctant Lady

Gender and Power Divides:

Breaking the titles down along gender lines required a little chart-making:

Almost all categories are dominated by the female-identified descriptor, which is . . . completely unsurprising.

I also wanted to talk a little about the language being used, which implies some value judgments. Love, it seems, is usually a scandalous enterprise:

These sin-ful titles make up almost 8% of the total. Many of them are likely historical romances, but I wanted to include them before this chart:

Mixed in with generic words such as "love" and "desire" are some that suggest lack of control and powerlessness. Generally, a loss of agency is exemplified by boss romances, but is also a prominent feature of many other romance subgenres. Combined with the previous chart, we can see a focus on surrendering, possibly against your will, to a scandalous desire. Again, not surprising.

Miscellaneous:

• Werewolves and vampires seem to be trending downward, with only three mentions of each (in addition to a "Wolf" and an "Alpha," giving the werewolves a dubious victory).
• There were six mentions of angels and archangels and six mentions of devils or "devilish," which is likely an adjective rather than a demonic protagonist.
• There were 11 mentions of homes, houses, and homecomings.
• The sea and sea-related things, which seemed to be trending last year, only made it to four titles.
• There were only 9 Christmas titles listed, plus two mistletoe titles and one Valentine's Day title.
• Unsurprisingly, titles were much more likely to feature dark* (17) than light (1) or sun (2), with various iterations: moonlight (4), starlight (1), twilight (2), midnight (5), and of course night/nightfall (13). Things were also hotter (10) than they were cold (2).
• There was also a certain amount of blood (7) and death (10). Romance can be hard.

Based on my findings, the most popular trends across all subcategories (occupations, atmospheric, descriptive, etc.) are:

Therefore, my suggested can't-miss titles for 2013, according to my crystal ball algorithm (drumroll):

Bride of Scandal, Lady of the Secret Dark
Seducing the Scandalous Lady by Nightfall: Her Secret Bride's Lover (this plot is super complicated)

If you're an author, these titles are free for the taking. Strike while the iron is hot! Feel free to leave your own suggestions in the comments.

Meditation Index

Meditation on 2010 Romance Novel Titles

In late 2009, I reviewed the Romantic Times list of award nominees for that year and came up with some conclusions about their titles, particularly about historical romances. This past year, I was late on the RT nominees, but that's fine, because I am just in time to evaluate their 2010 list and the
Romance Writers of America 2011 RITA and Golden Heart finalists (for books published in 2010; some titles appear on both lists). Last time, my approach was haphazard, to say the least, but this year I have a larger pool--let me pause to emphasize that these are all award-nominated books, and therefore I am being magnanimous by only evaluating the "best" titles out there--to work from, and I am prepared once again to come to Startling Conclusions about romance novel titles. My approach is still haphazard, but I've expanded the artificially-created categories that I'm arbitrarily using, so it's totally more scientific, right?

Notable Players:

Nobility: As usual, having a title is a big deal in romance-land (particularly for historicals), and the clear winner was Duke, with 8 titles. Er, should that be title-titles? [Followed by Lord: 4, Lady: 3, King, Prince, Earl, and Countess: 2, Queen, Duchess, Baron, Royal, and "Gentleman": 1] I'm going to go ahead and put the two "Heiress" titles here as well. Total: 30 titles. My favorite: I Kissed an Earl.

Punctuation: This is my favorite trend. There were, naturally, a ton of series romance books using colons in ill-advised ways (eight titles), but the question mark made a strong showing as well this year, appearing in five titles. There was also one title that sported an exclamation point! My favorites (I can't choose just one): Hired: Sassy Assistant and, doubling up on punctuation, Marriage: For Business or Pleasure? Total: 14 titles.

Rogues: There was some speculation on Twitter that Rogan (he prefers to be known as "Rogue") was "in" as a hero name after I posted my review of The Master's Mistress. Not only is Rogue popular as a name, "rogue" was big in titles as well, carrying five novels alone, and there were an additional four with the synonyms "rebel" or "renegade" to recommend them. My favorite: Red-Hot Renegade. [Related: There were also five book titles that referenced rakes, scoundrels, or libertines. Those words have a somewhat more unsavory flavor, however, so I didn't include them in "Rogue" proper. Feel free to disagree violently in the comments.]

Death: A surprising number of titles were "deadly," "fatal," "lethal," or had something else to do with killing. I am going to chalk this up to genrefusion and move on. This category is so boring that I don't have a favorite title.

Christmas: As I noted in an earlier post on Christmas titles, they're the gift that keeps on giving. From the gag-worthy Christmas with Her Boss (... award-nominated, remember?) to my personal favorite, A Cop in Her Stocking, these books are apparently year-round favorites. Total: 10 + 2 novellas.

Notably Absent or Diminished:

• Only 3.5 (one was a novella) mentions of millionaires or billionaires or tycoons or magnates. This has to be an ALL-TIME LOW. And as much as I hate the boss-employee trend that is so hot right now, there were only six titles that overtly referenced it.
• Corollary: Only THREE Sheikh titles! What is this world coming to?
• Only seven Scots titles. I feel like I personally have ordered at least 10 "Highlander" books this past year, so it surprised me that there were so few, especially considering there is a whole category for "Scotland-Set Historical Romance" in the RT awards. There was one, ahem, rogue title that went Irish instead.
• Four "angel" titles. I don't think this is as much of a thing as we were led to believe it might be, and here is the evidence. Speaking of "evidence," that word was featured in two titles. 
• The four "devil" titles pretty much cancel out the angel titles, right?

Yawnworthy:

• Marriage or weddings were mentioned in eleven titles. Brides or wives were mentioned in an additional eight. 
• A solid 15 titles contained the words "night" or "midnight," with an additional seven calling on "dark" or "darkness." I'll also throw the four "moon" or "moonlight" titles on top of that heap.
• Eleven titles referenced temptation or seduction in some way. Not surprising, as these are romance novels we're discussing. Another eight talked about kissing. 
• Emphasizing the moral element, nine titles were "wicked" while four talked about sin. 
• There were a few surrenders (4), some "forbidden" romances (3), and, interestingly (possibly only to me?), four "stranger" titles.
• There must be something in it, because several titles referenced the sea, or sailing, or islands, or water. 

For those of you who are visual learners, I have made graphs to chart the most frequent themes and the most frequent "atmospheric" choices:

These are the themes or words that came up most often in the pool of 100+ nominees. Someone interested in publishing the next big romance novel would be wise to include ALL of them, or at least as many as possible. For example:

The Roguish Duke's Midnight Seduction: Island of the Deadly Christmas Moon?

I think it has a nice ring to it. Feel free to submit your own Ideal Title in the comments.

ETA other favorite titles:  Dad's E-mail Order Bride; Knight of Passion; They Almost Always Come Home; and Zoe and the Tormented Tycoon.

Meditation Index

Book Review: The Master's Mistress [2010]

I first became aware of The Master's Mistress by Carole Mortimer while I was reviewing (and tweeting) series romance titles, as I do every month when I work on my paperback order. What caught my eye was the description:

Hired to catalog the Sullivan House library, Elizabeth Brown is in her element. Books she can handle. Men—well, she's a little less experienced in that department. She's certainly not at all prepared for the unexpected arrival of the master of the house, Rogan Sullivan!Rogan is dark, dangerous and wickedly sexy—exactly the kind of man Elizabeth has read she should stay away from. But it's not long before Rogan is showing his virgin librarian reasons she should let herself be seduced by a masterful rogue….[emphasis mine]

There's nothing that amuses me more than a good "sexy librarian" stereotype, and I went into this expecting the book to be bad. It's a series romance, after all, and I've read some truly terrible books in that genre. I was prepared to forgive a certain amount of awful dialogue, inept description, one-dimensional characterization, transparent plot "twists," and a sudden final lurch toward marital bliss. I was even prepared to deal with the painful "virgin heroine" trope. I wasn't hoping for any creative subversion of the stereotype (such as my own alternate version, where she runs off with the hero's sister, who appreciates her love of rare books), but the flaws would have been bearable if the character had actually been a librarian!

This spiky woman--a lecturer in History who catalogued libraries in her spare time, for heaven's sake!--simply wasn't his type. Absolutely not. [66]

That's right, the largest crime that The Master's Mistress is guilty of committing (and there are many, not least of which is its inane title) is that its heroine is not, in fact, a librarian, but a college professor who catalogs books in order to escape from the trauma of her parents' relationship. FALSE ADVERTISING, I SAY! Needless to say, this revelation did not make me more disposed to overlook the book's other flaws.

Given my understandable outrage upon my discovery of the horrendous and traumatizing fraud perpetrated by the book's description, I will try to summarize the plot as best I can:

FakeLibrarian: I love sexy vampire novels! OMG the son of my dead employer looks just like the hero in my book.
Rogan "Rogue" Sullivan: I am mysterious and hate my dead father and I used to be in the military and am an American, even though this book is set in England. I like instability. I will never be tied down.
FakeLibrarian: I like stability and routine. And everything about your hot body, even though I am a virgin and also hate you, for some reason.
[sexytimes on the beach]
Rogue: My mother died and it was my father's fault.
FakeLibrarian: My mother died and it was my father's fault.
[sex in the kitchen]
Rogue: Holy shit, you're a virgin!
FakeLibrarian: Don't stop! It will never work out between us, but you're right, I should mend fences with my father before he dies, too.
Rogue: I want to go with you! And you're right, we are too different.
[later]
Both: Let's get married! And have multiple kids!

Grade: D

Random Quotes, or Rogan's Amazing Throbbing Thighs:

"Rogan gave a low groan in his throat as he felt his body respond to her, his thighs stirring, hardening, pulsing. Aching!" [61]

"As the hard throb of his thighs now testified!" [122]

"...he rasped stupidly, his thighs throbbing anew just at the thought of having Elizabeth offering herself to him like that." [129]

Seriously, he should get that thigh condition looked at; it sounds painful. And, the lines of the book I most related to . . . books don't kill people, bad romance novel-inspired rage kills people!

"'Books don't harm people. They're here to provide knowledge. Entertainment. They're my life.' Her voice wobbled emotionally. 'My friends,' she added shakily as the tears once again fell softly down her cheeks." [107]

Book Review Index
Dead Mother: Yes (x2)

Review of Series Romance Titles: Christmas Edition

Now would be a good time to order series romance if you were in to stories about Christmas. If you're in to one of those other holidays that fall around the same time of year, not so much, although there are a few that don't use "Christmas" in the title. Looking at the December 2010 Ingram Advance, there are 87 unique series romance titles, some of which are available in "Larger Print."

Forty-one of them (47%), some of which are two-in-one books, have something to do with the holidays. I am listing them here because they are quite a sight to see, all clustered together:

A Countess by Christmas, A Cowboy Under the Mistletoe, A Man for All Seasons, A Mistletoe Proposal, A Silverhill Christmas, A Thunder Canyon Christmas, An Amish Christmas, Christmas at Candlebark Farm, Christmas Bodyguard, Christmas Under Western Skies: A Prairie Family Christmas\A Cowboy's Christmas, Colton's Christmas Baby, Daddy by Christmas, Her Christmas Hero, His Christmas Virgin, I'll Be Yours for Christmas, Inheriting His Secret Christmas Baby, It Must Have Been the Mistletoe..., Jingle Bell Blessings, Northern Escape, Once Upon a Christmas Eve, One Special Christmas and Home for the Holidays, Private Parts, Rescued by His Christmas Angel, Snowbound Seduction, The Bachelor's Christmas Bride, The Bull Rider's Christmas Baby, The Christmas Proposition, The Holiday Nanny, The Holiday Triplets, The Lawman's Christmas Wish, Twins Under His Tree, Under the Millionaire's Mistletoe: The Wrong Brother\Mistletoe Magic, Under Wraps, Unwrapping the Playboy, Winchester Christmas Wedding, Yuletide Cowboy, and Yuletide Defender.

Checking in on another trend that I loathe and wish would disappear (or at least be significantly less popular), books that feature "secret babies" and pregnant/new mother heroines are unfortunately still going strong. Nineteen (21%) featured pregnancies or new mothers, and another twenty (23%) featured children who had lost one or both parents. Although there was certainly a lot of overlap, one would be hard-pressed to find a "normal" romance novel in this lot that didn't have to do with children or Christmas, risking getting stuck with a book like The Holiday Nanny: "And with some help from his little girl, Wade just might turn his holiday nanny into a permanent wife and mother."

Someone please save me from the "unexpected pregnancy" storylines! At least this trope is harder to write in to my beloved Regency romances. Give me an arranged marriage, a rake to reform, or a marriage of convenience any day.

Best Title of the Month:

Zoe and the Tormented Tycoon

Runners Up:

The Bull Rider's Christmas Baby and Yuletide Defender

PS, check out the fun we're having over at MARC of the Beast, posting all the cleverest and most hideous cozy mystery and romance titles! You can follow us on Twitter at @MARCof_theBeast.

Book Review: The Virgin Bride Said, "Wow!" [2001]

I picked up this Harlequin romance by Cathy Gillen Thacker for the title alone, make no mistake. It's the last book of a series, The Lockharts of Texas, that I definitely haven't read the rest of, including The Bride Said, "Surprise!", The Bride Said, "Finally!", and The Bride Said, "I Did?" While the punctuation of all four titles is extremely irksome, I feel that The Virgin Bride Said, "Wow!" is definitely the "best" of the lot. Apparently the rest of her sisters weren't virgins when they got married, for one thing. Also, VERY IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER, as far as I remember, she never did say "wow" during the course of the book (despite having over two-hundred pages in which to accomplish this feat), and certainly not in the sort of salacious situation that a seasoned romance reader like myself might imagine and hope for. I could be wrong, but I am not reading it again to make sure.

Kelsey Lockhart and Brady Anderson have started a promising ranch business together, but they need more money, fast. In order to get a loan, they get married to prove to the loan officer (a family friend) that their business arrangement is going to be a lasting partnership. The notoriously fickle (and VIRGINAL) Kelsey has a reputation for never following through, and Brady is hiding a mysterious past from everyone. Of course. It has something to do with the guy that keeps coming around and being vaguely threatening. And then Kelsey and Brady end up having sex after several close calls, I forget on which pretense, and fall in love! Brady turns out to be the secret heir to an oil fortune! They get married again, but this time for reals! THE END.

Grade: C-/D+

I probably would have cared more about the characters if I had grown to know and love them in the earlier books in the series, so I am being a little lenient about the lack of introduction. While reading, I remembered yet again why I usually shy away from series romance titles: there inevitably comes a point (not nearly close enough to the end) where I am rolling my eyes and waving the book around and wishing they would GET TOGETHER ALREADY. The obstacles are the type that, given the weak character and plot development up to that point (generally post-sex but pre-"I love you"), stretch the bounds of believability.

I also dislike the gender roles as they are played out in mainstream romance, although this book at least featured an equal business partnership instead of a handsome gajillionaire (which Brady is) falling for his subordinate. Despite her "tomboy" status (referred to several times), Kelsey is unable or unwilling to:

• Bargain for a good price on horses, despite the fact that she owns a ranch
• Work a computer
• Disobey Brady when he orders her into the house
• Talk to her sister about a broken laptop without his help

My eyes did a lot of rolling, let me tell you. So, in conclusion, don't bother reading The Virgin Bride Said, "Wow!", because I've already done the work for you. Just sit back and enjoy the sheer beauty of that title.

Book Review Index
Dead Mother: Yes, two for two! So many dead mothers, it's hard to handle!

Review of October's Series Romance Title Themes

Because I am so irritated at Ingram for not having blurbs with their series romance offerings for October (which I usually share on Twitter for the edification of the world), I thought I would do a review of the month's titles and themes. Series romance (Harlequin, Silhouette, etc.) is traditionally one of the worst (and I say that in a loving way) genres in terms of lack of descriptiveness, repetitiveness, and grammatical ineptitude in titling. Which is why I LOVE THEM. This month's catalog features over 100 titles, some of which are dull and run-of-the-mill, but many of which put them in a specific subgenre—with some overlap, of course.

Themes for October:

Christmas (which seems a long way away from mid-September, but if you consider that libraries should be ordering these in time to get them processed and on the shelves by the time holiday fever really strikes, it's not completely insane): 

Christmas Countdown

A Cop in Her Stocking

Covert Christmas: Open Season\Second-Chance Sheriff\Saving Christmas

His Holiday Bride

Mistletoe Prayers: The Bodine Family Christmas\The Gingerbread Season 

Royal Holiday Baby

Silent Night Stakeout

The Spy Who Saved Christmas

Western Winter Wedding Bells: Christmas in Red Willow\The Sheriff's Housekeeper Bride\Wearing the Rancher's Ring

Work-related:

Boardroom Rivals, Bedroom Fireworks!

Cinderella & the CEO

From Boardroom to Wedding Bed?

Innocent Secretary...Accidentally Pregnant [which wins my vote for Most Terrible Title this month]

Juggling Briefcase & Baby

Not Just the Nanny

Taming Her Billionaire Boss

Greeks and Shiekhs:

Boda Con el Magnate Griego = Marriage with the Greek Tycoon

The Good Greek Wife?

El Jeque Seductor = The Seductive Sheik

Powerful Greek, Housekeeper Wife

Saved by the Sheikh!

Cowboys:

Betrayal in the Badlands

Boots and Bullets

Cattle Baron Needs a Bride

Cowgirl Makes Three
Elly: Cowgirl Bride

Prairie Courtship

When the Cowboy Said I Do

Wyoming Lawman

Yukon Cowboy

Secret Children:

For the Sake of the Secret Child

A Miracle for His Secret Son

WTF? (my other top picks): 

Chantaje en la Cama = Blackmail Into the Bed

His Virgin Acquisition

Majesty, Mistress...Missing Heir

Public Marriage, Private Secrets

The Reluctant Wrangler

Ultimatum: Marriage

If you’ve made it this far, you might as well participate in the other part of my exercise, which is to have my “revenge” on Ingram for not posting blurbs by creating some of my own. If you’d like to play, select a title from the list above and create a blurb for it in the comments, like so:

His Virgin Acquisition. Randolph Edward Burgess IV was a savvy businessman . . . he thought. But when the fruits of his latest hostile takeover arrive in the form of the nubile and possibly underage daughter of his chief nemesis, the fashion-forward Chloë Vernon, he knows he’s got a lot of accounting to do to make everything reconcile.

The Reluctant Wrangler. All Ted Gunther ever wanted was a chance to open his own decorating firm and make the houses of Spivey, Texas look their most fabulous. Unfortunately, as the son and brother of the region’s foremost horsemen, he is stuck throwing rope tricks . . . until a beautiful city-slicker, Natasjia Donner, who also happens to be an angel investor of some note, breezes into town with her nervous male assistant in tow.

Further Meditation on Romance Novel Titles: Historical Fiction Edition

So after I got back to work on the Romantic Times Book Reviews Nominees for the 2009 RT Awards(see the previous post on this subject), I found that there was yet more material for me to work with, in the form of the "Best Historical Novels" category. It turns out that historical romance writers, with all of history to work with, have a surprisingly limited range of words when they are naming their books. I decided to see if I could use the data I collected to create a kind of "uber-historical romance title" that would fit almost any book in the subgenre.

Out of 80 titles (I left out the "Historical Biography" category, which featured 4 queens, 1 king, and a virgin, on the grounds that it strayed toward nonfiction), titles that included the word:

Scotland or Highland: 11
Wicked: 9
Lord/Lady/Laird: 8 [This does not include Duke/Duchess(3), Courtesan(2), Queen(2), Marquess(1), Baron(1), Earl(1), or Knight(1)--including those would bring the total of nobility-based titles up to 19, or about 25% of the total]
Tempt/Temptation/Tempted: 7
Mid/Night: 4
Devil: 3

Now, the Scotland count is a bit skewed, due to the "Scotland-Set Historical Romance" category, which consists of five novels, but still, I didn't even include the new Diana Gabaldon in my assessment. I think we can probably place a large amount of the blame on her for the Scots-Romance boom.

Taking all these factors into consideration, I have decided that my Ultimate Historical Romance Title, which I will apply to an as-yet unwritten masterpiece of fiction, will be (drum roll):

Tempting the Wicked Scottish Lord at Midnight
A quick check of the Library of Congress assures me that this title is STILL AVAILABLE. I can hardly believe it! I should probably get to writing TWSLM right away, but as I am on vacation, I think I will put it off until 2010.


ETA: My favorite title on this list was, hands-down, The Runaway McBride.

Meditation on Recent Series Romance Novel Titles

Today I took the opportunity to inspect the Romantic Times Book Review nominees for the best books of 2009. I thought "hey, I'll take a look at this list, and see how many of these I actually ordered. They're supposed to be the best of the best, right?" Somehow I got from that noble goal to where I am now. First of all [disclaimer], we don't order a lot of series romance.¹ There's such a tremendous volume of paper published every month by Harlequin, Silhouette, and so forth that our modest paperback budget can't possibly keep up. However, Best Series Romance Novels 2009 caught my attention for another reason: titling. Often absurd titling. Out of the 83 titles listed on the page, I discerned some interesting themes, which I will attempt to enumerate here:

Children/Babies/Family: 10 ["by surprise": 2]
I was guessing that The Mistake She Made and Next Comes Love might have something to do with pregnancy, but a check of Harlequin SuperRomance proved me wrong. Just as well. I also think that the whole "by surprise" thing (i.e., The Doctor's Surprise Family) is very odd.
Tycoon/Millionaire/Billionaire/Playboy, etc.: 10
Men with money is always a popular theme. We had a discussion on Twitter² the other day about how these wealthy people are all, inevitably, male. Even the Merriam-Webster definition of "tycoon" agrees. I did gather, though, that Greek men are remarkably wealthy (The Greek Millionaire's Secret Child and Powerful Greek, Unworldly Wife).
Christmas: 5
Always a crowd pleaser. Extra bonus: Always Valentine's Day and A Cold Creek Holiday
Cowboy/Cowgirl/Maverick: 5
Has there been any long-lasting McCain/Palin impact? Only time will tell.

There were a smattering of titles involving military men and/or rangers (4), and not as many as I expected dealing with weddings (4). There were three books having to do with a boss romance (again, presumably the boss is male), my favorite of which was The Boss's Inexperienced Secretary.

By favorite, I mean ironic favorite, because my main complaint with this list--a list that is presumably a compilation of the best that a certain genre has to offer during a particular year--is that the titles are terrible. I mean, The Boss's Inexperienced Secretary? That sounds like something I would have come up with in my course on Titling When You Only Know Bare Details About Plot. Also, the implications are kind of creepy. For a lot of the titles, it sounds as if the publisher or author (I'm not sure where to place the blame) took the stereotype of the male character and the stereotype of the female character and stuck them together. These are the kinds of titles that I hate the most, Powerful Greek, Unworldly Wife and The French Tycoon's Pregnant Mistress being outstanding examples. Looking ahead at the Harlequin Presents upcoming releases, this trend will (sadly) be continuing into the new year: Prince of Montéz, Pregnant Mistress and Untamed Italian Blackmailed Innocent, anyone? And no, there was no comma in that last title. Why bother?

So, without more ado, here is my list of five favorite best/worst titles from the list:

5. The Frenchman's Plain-Jane Project. It just doesn't flow, people.
4. Memo: The Billionaire's Proposal. Experimenting with formatting, I like that!
3. Seduced into a Paper Marriage. I am imagining a paper house, paper car, paper bed . . .
2. More than a Man. I hesitate to ask in what way.
1. Anna Meets Her Match. Now this one I would actually read.

That was an exhausting review. I'm just going to take the edge off a little by reading my prized copy of The Playboy Sheikh's Virgin Stable-Girl--once I figure out why it didn't make the "Best-Of" cut.

¹I would like to say at this point that I am an unapologetic reader of romance novels, and that Harlequin has my name and address and sometimes sends me free stuff, some of which is even cool (note the title of the top left cover). Now those are some gripping titles. It's a pleasant habit I formed long ago, at the feet (or on the shelves) of my mother, and I quite enjoy it.

²Thanks again to @Tuphlos, for always posting the BEST book covers on Twitter. And thanks to @MrsFridayNext, for teaching me how to do HTML footnotes.

ETA: Go here for the sequel to this post.

Update: Apparently Canadian researchers are also tackling this important subject (thanks @jpetroroy).