Saturday, June 28, 2008


So we were actually in a situation the other day when we were at a Sun game and there were so many jump balls that they actually had to play the traditional jump ball songs more than once, and possibly in one case three times. For the record, these traditional songs are (in order of appearance):

"Jump Around" - House of Pain
"Jump" - Van Halen
"Jump" - Kriss Kross

As a regular consumer, I think they could stand to mix it up a little more, for those situations where -- since the WNBA does not have an alternate possession rule -- we are bored out of our minds because the referees can't call fouls when they should. Here are some songs I would recommend that the Sun, and possibly the league, consider adding to the rotation:

1. "The Joint is Really Jumping Down at Carnegie Hall" - Judy Garland - Sure, this is probably one of Judy's least well known songs, and it includes the lyrics:

The philharmonic was so dignified
But now they're groovy and starting to ride,
Handel and Haydn are facing the wall
'cause The Joint Is Really Jumpin' down in Carnegie Hall.

I think the New York Liberty, in particular, could benefit, seeing as Carnegie Hall is just up the street. Who wouldn't be entertained by the thought of executing some classical composers? I wonder what they would request for their last meals? It's a nice change-of-pace song for that fourth jump ball.

2. "Jump" - The Pointer Sisters - Why not go retro? In the case of this group, you could probably actually book them to come sing the song live when that crucial fifth jump ball happens. Just for variety.

3. "Jumper" - Third Eye Blind - Sure, it's a little depressing, but sometimes you just want to put the past away. Especially when you've reached the point of the sixth jump ball.

Friday, June 20, 2008


We are both going to have jobs in September! Good ones, too! I could not be happier.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

A New Era of Blogging?

I have mentioned before that I hate the words "blog" and "blogger" and, yes, "blogging," so that's not what I will be doing here. Instead, I will be offering rare glimpses into a brilliant and archaic mind: my own. I call it . . . typing my thoughts.

So, my father just called to say that he was in Decorah, IA. Why was he there and not somewhat farther down the road from Utah to Maine? Well, it turns out that he left twice. Yes, in the grand tradition of our family, he left for the first time on Monday night with a totally unsuitable car (a Ford Taurus) pulling a trailer full of crap. Naturally, it broke down somewhere after Park City and they had to be towed back to Salt Lake. This is very much shades of my childhood, and I have to wonder: Dad, why put so much faith in the damn Ford Tauri? Haven't you learned your lesson yet? Don't you remember the camping incident? What about the time our old station wagon would only drive backward? I seem to remember having the transmission replaced at least twice. What about the time the current Taurus broke down all the way across the country? Remember how it was only giving you heat in the summer and cold air in the winter?

My final words: Buy. Japanese.

Friday, June 6, 2008

Sports and the National Anthem

I am a firm believer of the idea that sports and the national anthem should have nothing to do with each other outside of an Olympic medal ceremony. According to this article, the national anthem wasn't even a common component of sporting events until the run up to World War II required more patriotic fervor from the general populace. When I was in junior high, I began substituting "Zeus" or other monosyllabic names into the Pledge of Allegiance, because it made me very uncomfortable to be forced to give my support to a god that, frankly, I didn't believe in. It has also been my custom for several years now to remain seated when the national anthem is played at sporting events. I simply do not believe that sports and politics--like church and state--should be mixed, and I refuse to endorse that mixture with my actions. What does my national anthem have to do with the shameless commercialism of a typical professional basketball game? Apparently, everything.

Today when we sat quietly during the national anthem at the Connecticut Sun game, we were asked if there was anything wrong with our legs, called disrespectful, and questioned vehemently as to the validity of our actions. We are also apparently young, stupid, and required by our American citizenship to honor the flag whenever it is presented. We had a reasonable discussion with an adjacent seatmate about our reasons for sitting--which also include not blindly endorsing a country that has, is, and will be engaged in torturing and killing people for profit--but the group of women in front of us became progressively more insulting, refusing to leave us alone and repeatedly explaining that our freedom as Americans meant that we had to stand up for the national anthem, that their fathers and other relatives had served so we could be so selfish, etc.

This was very disturbing for a variety of reasons, but because I'm me, what is most upsetting is that it ruined my basketball game, and I'm afraid it's going to ruin the rest of the season. As a season ticket holder, I'm afraid that I'm going to be spending the rest of the season in the same space as hateful, angry people who will not agree to disagree. It is hard to believe that people who are apparently so passionate about American nationalism are unable to accept that one of the founding principles of this country is (in my understanding, my grasp of history is a little fuzzy) the ability to dissent peacefully. I understand that people have reasons for standing during the national anthem, for joining the military, and for putting flag bumper stickers on their cars. Fine. They can do all those things. But--don't tell me what to do. I'm just here to cheer for my women's basketball team.